/A different kind of letter.
It’s almost that time again.
It is almost weekend and time to go to Spain again.
Whilst I will revert to the exiting - and not exiting - thing on business the coming day(s). Today I wanted to write a bit about the famous month of December that is coming.
Who is important to you right now, and how has that changed? These thoughts come to the forefront for me each year when the leaves start to accumulate on the ground and when I packing my bags to go to the states next week. But Christmas for me will never be same so I think about it differently now.
Who should I contact for a holiday check-in? Should I call my parents, text my ex ?
What dancing partner do I want to have on New Year's Eve - or should I go climbing that mountain in Africa as planned this year - Where should I concentrate my relational efforts? Answers change as people's lives do, but for me, what never changes is what I look for in all of my relationships: a sense of belonging, a connection, loyalty, support, and adventure (and sometimes commiseration).
My work has always been centered on a sense of belonging. Being a part of a community, setting, tradition, friendship. Our feelings of belonging are entwined with our identities. Have you ever observed how certain people and places trigger the activation of different parts of you? They do with me and NY and Spain and Lodon do for me a lot.
Lately I have been seeing a lot of break-ups a lot of heart breaking break ups and I have also seen a lack on communications in those breakups - not only business but also privately -
I talked to a friend in mine the last week who was “dumped” over text after years. Leaving her with a big question obviously.
When these things happen should you draw a line and just leave and never look back , or should you stand in your values and still - when big events happen - connect - does it really costs that much effort to send a text -
I see this in work and private a lot.
But lately I have also seen a lot of these good things.. I am most likely meeting an impressive person again for lunch tomorrow - hard working, smart and self made.
I am spending time with two employees I know for a decade and more next week in Gibraltar again and I will meet new people in the states. and maybe I even stop by in NY… All are open and nice and embracing events with nice people who in December dare to connect.
It is also almost that time of the year.
There comes a time in our adult lives when we realize that a lot of the holiday magic of our childhood was the result of significant sacrifices: our mother worried about getting the gifts we wanted; the father missed many family dinners while working long hours to pay for the holiday feast; the dad worked all night wrapping presents . These heartfelt acts are where the true holiday spirit resides, but like other spirits, it can also be unsettling.
In this time of the year I wanted to be in Spain or home with that one special person who taught me the value of Christmas, and ideally raising my own family now. But life has a funny way of catching up on things and now a small text, a drink at a bar with a colleague a call to home every weekend does make an an impact and creates a smile whilst that is not there.
Be kind people, not two days a year but 5 minutes every day.. it doens’t hurt even in shitty situations.
Have a good evening .. one more month.. my book comes is ready and it’s Christmas.